Gifting a knife
Gifting a knife is unlucky in a familiar belief, since a blade might sever the bond. Yet in old England, a fine pair of knives was a standard gift for a bride, so the custom says less about knives than about what gifts carry.
What it may mean
In Shakespeare's England, women wore a small knife, or two in one sheath, at the girdle, and a finer pair was a common wedding gift. Plays of the time mention "my wedding knives" and a new pair of Sheffield knives for a bride and groom. In the same years, an English writer listed among popular superstitions that knives given to a sweetheart would cut away the love between them. Both ideas lived side by side. A knife prepares food, mends and makes, and it also separates. Which of those a gift says depends on the giver and the moment. Passing back a coin, so that the present becomes a tiny purchase, keeps the useful side and sends the cutting side away. A knife changing hands raises the question of what your own gifts carry beyond the object.
Depending on how you saw it
A chef's knife as a wedding gift
A good kitchen knife can last decades and be used every day of a marriage. Many couples happily hand back a coin and keep the knife. Which gift in your home is used so often that you forget who gave it?
A first pocketknife for a young person
In many families, handing a child a first pocketknife marks a step in confidence and responsibility. The gift says: I think you can handle this. Who in your life is waiting for a sign that you trust them with something sharp?
When the recipient hands you a penny
A penny pressed into your hand in return can feel odd or charming. It is a small ritual that lets both of you keep the friendship whole. Which little ritual helps you and someone close smooth over a moment that could feel awkward?
Giving scissors or a razor
Old English lists put scissors and razors with knives, anything with an edge. Sharp tools often make the most practical gifts, so the worry comes up at graduations and housewarmings. Which practical gift have you avoided giving because of what it might seem to say?
Why it happens in nature
In sixteenth- and seventeenth-century England, both men and women carried their own knives, and decorated pairs were given as love tokens and wedding presents. The belief that a sharp gift cuts a bond later spread widely, and paying a coin or a pin in return makes the exchange a token purchase, so that, in the logic of the belief, nothing is cut.
What folk beliefs say
England
Brand noted that knives were once part of a bride's equipment in England: women wore knives at the girdle, and a finer pair was bought or presented for the wedding, as plays of the 1600s mention.
Source: John Brand; Henry Ellis (ed.), Observations on the Popular Antiquities of Great Britain, vol. 2 (1849), vol. 2, p. 131. View the page
England
Melton's Astrologaster of 1620, quoted by Brand, listed among popular superstitions that it was wrong for a man to give a pair of knives to his sweetheart, for fear it would cut away the love between them.
Source: John Brand; Henry Ellis (ed.), Observations on the Popular Antiquities of Great Britain, vol. 3 (1849), vol. 3, p. 250. View the page
To reflect on
What do your gifts tend to say beyond the object itself?